As someone who posts quite regularly on social media, I get many messages from people who have told me this – ‘I wish my life was just like yours, you seem so focused, happy, successful. I wish I had it easy like you do. I wish I could buy stuff like you and charge like you. I wish I had the confidence that you have and I wish I could be as courageous as you.’
Let me confess, these are quite beautiful and flattering comments. I’m also happy to say that I receive them, pretty much on a daily basis. But I also feel as if I’ve deceived you unintentionally because my life is not all that perfect as it seems to most people. I’m just as disorganized, unmotivated, lost, confused, disappointed, sad, and my life is pretty difficult on most days. But because I don’t share that often on social media, it naturally looks easy.
I’ve often had a similar misunderstanding about someone else’s life too. And I’ve always hated the metaphor, ‘the grass is greener on the other side' It only wanted to make me go to the other side, even more. I understand how easy it looks, but has there been a time when you managed to get to the other side, only to find out, it’s even tougher?
I love writing. I enjoy the process of writing. But writing is tough. Sometimes the words just don’t flow. Sometimes the sentences don’t make sense. Sometimes, it takes twice the effort. So, each time I would listen to a podcast, or audiobook, it made me feel as if that was so much easier and wouldn’t it be nice if I could do something like that? I mean it's so much easier than writing. Right!?
So, I got started and got to recording podcasts. Yes, initially it felt easy. I just have to speak, I said. But as the days went by it started feeling burdensome. Just like it does for my writing when it’s a bad day, creatively. And to be honest, writing came so naturally for me, almost effortlessly, whereas this required a lot of conscious effort and most importantly, didn’t feel like me. It felt good to get it out of my system. Since everyone talks about podcasts and how cool it would be to have one. It felt really nice to try it. But I knew I couldn’t live in that space for longer.
And soon, albeit slowly, I started writing again. And each time I experienced a day where I tried to look for something ‘easy’ more ‘inviting’ more ‘interesting’ I paused. Took a break and got back to writing, slowly and it got better each day.
The more I think about it. My life has been this way too. I’ve often confused myself between inspiration, escapism, and imitation. It can be very easy to get influenced by those who have it all and make it look so effortless. “Why can’t my life be so easy and simple, just like theirs?”
Quite frankly, if you do a 360 turn, you’ll notice how someone else is saying this about their life, by looking at your life. Don’t believe me? Laugh all you want! You’re probably wondering ‘My life!? Seriously?’ yes! Your life. I know this sounds way too philosophical than it probably is. But it doesn’t make it any less true. And that’s the point of my article.
I don’t know your story. I don’t know which phase of your life you’re currently in and what impact it has on you. I understand the temptation to simply want the life someone else is living. The one that feels ideal to you. But what if your journey is a lot less difficult than they had? Would that make a difference with the way you see your life? Probably yes.
I’ve often needed to search for motivation and inspiration more times because I receive setbacks very easily. I’ve often been so swayed and charmed by how beautiful something looks on the outside that I often get lost in the illusion and forget to draw a line at inspiration. It’s so common. Most creatives deal with this pretty much every day. I’d like to also add that not all those who wish to live and admire someone else’s life are unhappy with their own journey. It’s just that they don’t find their journey as inspiring and attractive as someone else’s journey.
As an individual, of course, your journey matters. But it would be cherished a lot more by you if you stop comparing your life with someone else’s. If you stop competing to get something that will probably never add as much value to your life, as you think it would. If your goals and intentions are in alignment with your purpose. Imagine, you wake up and tell yourself, ‘Hey! You have a great life and I can’t wait to live the kind of life you have.' It’s not that silly you know. Try it?
Meanwhile, I’m listing a few ways that can make you appreciate your journey a lot more –
It’s all about you, so enjoy the spotlight
You have the freedom to make mistakes, grow from them, and try again
You can always learn to upgrade the way you are living your life, to how you want to live your life (I can help with that)
You can learn to let go of control and allow things to happen in a timeline that occurs naturally
Try new things and break the monotony
Keep rewarding yourself with every success
Take feedback from people who are honest and uplift you
Be very grateful and appreciative of how things are taken care of in your life
Don’t wait for a better time to take action (Don’t procrastinate)
Don’t settle for less or easy
Don’t be afraid of hard-work
Stay true to your values, principles, and ethics
Be more receptive and less defensive
Appreciate compliments that come your way, also give compliments to those who inspire you
Don’t feel threatened by not reaching where you wish you, have faith
I know these aren’t very heavy points and perhaps you already know most or all of them. But consider this as a friendly reminder from me to you. Even though I don’t know your story or journey, I know for sure that your journey is unique.
With this article, I’d like to invite you to believe in yourself as much as you possibly can.
Thank you for reading.
Hope this article helped. If you did, kindly like the little heart below. It’ll only encourage me to write more often.
All my love,
Nikita
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